I have been giving way too much thought to a stupid piece of chocolate cake. Back around Christmas, my mother-in-law served this delectable chocolate cake w/ chocolate mousse in the middle, and chocolate butter cream icing on the outside. The cake itself was rich, chocolately, and all that a cake should be. I had a piece then, amidst the indulging of holiday times, and enjoyed it so very much.
Fast forward to this week. The aforementioned cake was huge. We did not eat the whole thing that Christmas. So my dear MIL wrapped it up carefully and froze it. She announced last Sunday that she is thawing it for my nephew's birthday party this Sunday night.
Nooooooooooooooooooooo! Say it isn't so! I have been back on track. I have lost the weight I gained over the holidays. I have detoxified myself from the sugar cravings. And she plans to offer me a slice of THE best cake I have ever eaten?? What do I do? I have been thinking about it all week.
I could just eat it, work it into my day, and move on. But if I have learned one thing in this journey, it is that I can never stop after one sugar-filled piece of cake, or cookie, or candy, or whatever. It is not the way I am made.
So I have made the decision NOT to eat the cake on Sunday. Pray that I will be strong. I know that a normal person could just cut back on other calories for the day, and manage the piece of cake without much damage. But I am not normal. (My sisters have told me that for years..it must be true.) I am not normal in my eating habits, or I wouldn't still weigh over 300 lbs, despite losing 80 in this past year. I doubt I will ever have a "normal" relationship with food. I can't be like other people. I just have to deal with this demon the best way I can. For me, that is remaining cakeless on Sunday. Jello pudding anyone??
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As soon as that cake comes out pop a piece of really minty gum that might help you.
ReplyDeleteAw, Sue...I can completely understand your feelings about the evil cake!! Definitely, been there; especially over the holidays. I think your decision is a good one. Sometimes, somedays, we just can't handle it and that's o.k. I usually have the added challenge of "food pushers" in my family who get offended if you don't eat it. But, I know what I can do and what I can't do and, like you, I CAN'T DO Chocolate Cake!!!! Good luck; I'll be thinking of you :)
ReplyDeleteYou can do this. We will all be sending positive thoughts your way. Jess has a great idea - put a strong flavoured gum in your mouth and chew away. Also, get up and go to the bathroom, leave the room to refill your water glass, anything to get yourself a bit of distance, even for a minute so that you can take a deep breath and remind yourself that you are doing this for you. There will be other cakes, you're just not going to have some THIS time.
ReplyDeleteYou can do it!! You can do it!! You can do it!!